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May. 9th, 2005 04:12 pmmotherhood, part I:
I am becoming very impatient with well-meaning folk who assure me the key to getting pregnant is "not to worry about it." I'm not saying they're wrong. But telling someone not to worry is like telling them not to think about elephants. I can't make myself "not worry" -- instead, I worry about the fact that I'm worrying. And I'm venting about it here because it's no use complaining to the people in question, because a) their intentions are good and b) they're very likely right.
motherhood, part II:
Somehow, the recurring theme of this mother's day was crappy mothers. Not my own -- my own is great. We argue a lot and aren't very close, but I have deep respect for her, she has greater integrity than anyone else I have ever met and an admirable disregard for popular opinion, and I'm proud to possess 90 percent of the traits I've inherited from her (whether by nature or nurture).
But I am really lucky. A lot of people I know were down the hall when they were handing out parents. I mean, really, I know motherhood is hard, and mothers get judged too harshly, and certainly I don't want to let fathers off the hook, but ... hooo, boy. Folks I love have really been damaged, damaged by the very people who should be on their side. Yesterday was the day to hug the moms; today I want to hug all the kids.
I am becoming very impatient with well-meaning folk who assure me the key to getting pregnant is "not to worry about it." I'm not saying they're wrong. But telling someone not to worry is like telling them not to think about elephants. I can't make myself "not worry" -- instead, I worry about the fact that I'm worrying. And I'm venting about it here because it's no use complaining to the people in question, because a) their intentions are good and b) they're very likely right.
motherhood, part II:
Somehow, the recurring theme of this mother's day was crappy mothers. Not my own -- my own is great. We argue a lot and aren't very close, but I have deep respect for her, she has greater integrity than anyone else I have ever met and an admirable disregard for popular opinion, and I'm proud to possess 90 percent of the traits I've inherited from her (whether by nature or nurture).
But I am really lucky. A lot of people I know were down the hall when they were handing out parents. I mean, really, I know motherhood is hard, and mothers get judged too harshly, and certainly I don't want to let fathers off the hook, but ... hooo, boy. Folks I love have really been damaged, damaged by the very people who should be on their side. Yesterday was the day to hug the moms; today I want to hug all the kids.